HEAVY METAL:
The protagonist arrives on a Harley Davidson, kills the dragon, drinks some
beers and fucks the princess
GRINDCORE:
The protagonist arrives, screams something completely undecipherable for
about 2 minutes and then leaves...
POWER METAL:
The protagonist arrives riding a white unicorn, escapes from the dragon,
saves the princess and they make love in an enchanted forest
THRASH METAL:
The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon, saves the princes and fucks
her....... easy and quick
FOLK METAL:
The protagonist arrives with some friends playing accordions, violins,
flutes and many more weird instruments, the dragon falls asleep (from all
the dancing) protagonist leaves without the princess
VIKING METAL:
The protagonist arrives in a ship, kills the dragon with his migthy axe,
cooks and eats it, rapes the princess to death, steals the cattle and burns
the place before he leaves
DEATH METAL:
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, fucks the princess and kills her,
then leaves
BLACK METAL:
The protagonist arrives at midnight, kills the dragon and impales it in the
front of the castle.....then sodomizes the princess, drinks her blood in a
ritual before killing her.....then he impales the deflowered princess
GOTHIC METAL:
The princess arrives, starts singing like an opera diva while she´s trying to look very mysterious. The dragon jumps onto his Harley Davidson and escapes from the castle into the enchanted forest with the hitchhiking Punk-protagonist and the beer.
BRUTAL DEATH METAL :
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon and spreads his guts in the front
of the castle, fucks the princess and kills her....then he fucks again her
dead body, slashes her belly open and eats her guts, fucks the carcass for
the third time, burns the corpse and fucks it for the last time
DOOM METAL:
The protagonist arrives, sees the size of the dragon and thinks that he
never could beat him, gets depressed and commits suicide....the dragon eats
his body and the princess as well
PROGRESSIVE METAL:
The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo for 26 minutes, the
dragon kills himself out of boredom, the protagonist arrives to the
princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the techniques learned in the
last year of the conservatory... the princess escapes, and is now looking
for the "HEAVY METAL" protagonist
GLAM METAL:
The protagonist arrives, the dragon laughs at the guy's appearance and lets
him enter, he steals the princess' make-up and tries to paint the castle in
a beautiful pink color
INDUSTRIAL METAL:
The protagonist arrives wearing greasy overcoat, makes an obscene gestures
towards dragon, and gets escorted out of fairy tale land by security guards.
EMOCORE:
The protagonists' mother drives the protagonist and his friends to the
castle. He kills the dragon with some awesome armspinning and spinkicking
while his friends observing the scene with their arms crossed; then the
princess laughes at the protagonists ridiculous hairstyle and the boys leave
weeping
PUNK:
The protagonist hitchhikes to the castle, asks the dragon for some bucks,
buys some cans of beer, gets pissed, insults the princess as "monarchist
cunt" and "commerce bitch", leaves the castle in a cop-car..
einfach nur köstlich oder nicht?
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